A word of warning:
Outside of the “When you go to a salad bar buffet near closing time, stay away from the tuna pasta salad” warning.
When you shake the wrinkles out of your jeans, watch for flying belt buckles.
I just busted my own lip. I’m BLEEDING, folks. And I’m sober. This is not a post-partying mishap.
I drew my own damn blood.
Good going, mmmdork! ;D
as for anything tuna, i stay away from it on general principles… any fish that looks like someones swollen toe is good enough reason for me to stay far the fuck away.
as for drawing you own blood, i do it all the time… from grabbing my keys the wrong way, falling down, bumping things, to cutting myself on everyday cuttlery or even dental floss once… dental floss…
but compared to me, the marx brothers were the epitome of coordination.
Swollen toes.
That’s SO bad.
So incredibly bad.
I can’t believe that for the rest of my life I will equate tuna and swollen toes.
ick.
ew.
gross.
You have now been granted access into “people whom I will always remember thanks to the gross things I will never forget” hall of fame.
Welcome!
okokok
Explain the dental floss incident!
Re: okokok
HAHAHAHA!!!!
Well I can’t laugh too much, I impaled myself with a fork once, fluffing mashed potatoes…
Re: okokok
I tend to bruise up my hips a lot, as I don’t really have a leash on that ass o’ mine. I run it into corners, chairs, countertops…
Re: Swollen toes.
strangely enough, outside the ‘HEY, YOU LOOK LIKE THAT GUY FROM TV” remark, the fact that i mentally scar is the second highest in the things said to me…
Re: Swollen toes.
Which guy on TV?
It can’t be as bad as the coked up in your face “you TOO can be a millionaire” guy…
Not that anyone has ever compared me to him, I’m just sayin’…
Re: okokok
it wasnt actually on the dental floss, though it has made my gums bleed when getting one of those hard to reach back teeth, that you have to pull and yank to get to… it was that little metal dealybob that you cut the floss with… and your finger too, if you are not carefull.
Re: okokok
I tend to bruise up my hips a lot, as I don’t really have a leash on that ass o’ mine. I run it into corners, chairs, countertops…